Dear Viv & Novellus,

I know, time flies and it has been a while since our wonderful 4-day session in July. I have waited for a time to sit down and reflect on everything we did - well now I found it .

Every single day since mid-July You have been on my mind and in my heart. When I go to bed, when running, when relaxing. I love it, you are like the essence of life and whenever my mind touches you, I feel elevated, calm and a little thrilled all at the same time.

It’s impossible for me to recall every position over the 4 days – maybe it will come back to me when I see the pictures. The sheer volume is one thing and at times you had me heavily parked in subspace, unable to pick out the details of all bondage, instead a 100% occupied with emotions, physical touch of rope, equipment and your hands, sensual overload, thrill, positive pain and all other things that is difficult to put into words.

I will return to day 4 below, but I just have to express that the flow you had that day was absolutely awesome, grand and unlike anything I have experienced before. Suspension after suspension, maybe allowed to touch the floor with ballets… I definitely felt more in the air than on the ground. Totally amazing! And at least once I asked for some rest to gather some strength but you just let that pass and continued, keeping me just on the right side of everything. The feeling in the suspended frog position was mind blowing…

I also loved all other things that you let me in to – being in the same room as a photo shoot, being lent out to another domina to practice suspension, being in a suspension with a female sub, other dominas passing by (and I’m sure I have missed a few). It is like being an integral part of the studio unable to do anything about it, just to take it all in.

I think it was like three different sets where we went a little bit deeper in shibari. The first time was against the cell bars. It didn’t work out exactly how you planned it as I couldn’t embrace it, then the second time was an amazing mix of fighting and just taking it in, when you made like a 360 degree spin with me, changing the ropes constantly. Then of course the very last thing we did upstairs at the pole – lets come back to that too.

Again, I can’t immediately recall everything I experienced this time. Still, exactly everything went into me and blended in to become the absolute best session I been in ever. No question. Just completely magic.
You did not make me come at any time and in a way that was a perfect thing. The bondage positions you had me in is so much deeper than coming and much more intimate.
I have to admit though that even though I’m a little nervous bringing it up, I just wonder how quick you could push me into a new position after coming (more like a punishment or something almost shameful than just simple enjoyment).

The overall balance of the complete session was perfect. Leaving me for the night in different setups, ordering me to have breakfast and prepare before you arrived worked great. All night I fell heavily asleep when allowed (when the time locks allowed) and I used all time to regain energy both physically and mentally. Thinking back though, I note that in all first positions after a night I was a bit nervous and could not relax properly. It disappeared after a while, and I don’t know why. More me than you Viv and we will figure something out to next time. One idea is to be tougher on preparations before you arrive in the mornings. This time, most mornings it was about shower, eat and put lenses in. A push could be to order me into a bondage position and locking it with the time locks or standard locks to break me into bondage mode.

Anyway I also kind of enjoyed waking up in the studio, being able to walk around looking at all the equipment, taking in the atmosphere and being clean and ready when you arrived. I also think it was good for you to actually get some time away from the studio as well, coming back with lots of ideas and energy.

I think that the time locks worked well. The first night downstairs, I got into a mild panic as my arms were placed above my head fell asleep. You had managed to lock the chains very good so I couldn’t get them out from the position (a good thing). So that’s why I used the emergency unlock function. This is something that only works 3 times the that is totally closed. If you want to kill that possibility just do it 3 times and they are gone.
All nights, I fell asleep in bondage straight away. The first night I woke up when my arms started to pinch, the second and third night I woke up long after the locks had opened. Maybe I liked the last night best, where you put me on the narrow bed and locked me in swiftly allowing no protest or mediaton of the position. Then you covered me with the bathrobe and just left. Yes, you had me exhausted every night, perfect!

Now back to the start. This time I hardly got my feet inside before you blindfolded me, put a head harness on and locked my hands. Then you let me hear Novella and so we got started. I really enjoyed this, like a no return thing, the start of something very special and very clear that I would just have to follow on. No chatting no seeing. Just feeling, hearing and a bondage mind racing. 

I do like the head harness. It’s a large ball for me but I get used to it after a while. One thing you can order me as morning prep is to put myself into the head harness, add some high heels, connect the head harness on a hook to force me to stand and then lock hands behind my back…
The last day you also used a head harness without a gag, that also worked well and can be revisited.

A very clear memory during the first day was being lowered on the fucking machine. There was a lot of things going on with heels I hadn’t had before, corset, body harness, clamps, leg splinters and I was suspended and forced to ride the machine. That ended too quickly. It was at firs a little frightening but then a perfect helpless situation. I remember clearly that you added lube as the machine was pumping and that small gesture added the feeling that you would keep it going for a long while… It was something with the arms as well, my body moved with the frequency of the machine, and the only connection to the floor was by being penetrated… Was it clamps involved as well? Was the head harness on and was it hooked to the ceiling?
Shortly after you had let me down you used a vibrator instead. That was so powerful because the other machine had opened me up both physically and mentally. The vibrator just took over and it was amazing. It was like being relaxed and being forced and used at the same time.

And then being suspended with your female sub. An absolute surprise. I didn’t notice any of the other preparations so it was not until I started to feel the added pressure  (and hear your anticipation) that I understood the scene. You made us look at each other and getting a moment of contact. An intense scene and I was so happy being part of your bondage thinking and ideas! 

I have done a scene once that I think you would find cool and would give great pictures. It requires that the female sub is ok to be bound body to body though. In short, you but me in an inverted X and then the female sub is positioned in a standing X her hands to my feet and vice versa, stomach to stomach. That would be an amazing look in your suspension studio. You could put a chastity device on me and force me to pleasure the female sub (shy now).

Still it was also really cool to be let down, still in bondage lying and seeing you female sub in a pretty tough upside down. Again it made me feel as a natural part of the context and helpless at the same time – just as when you later had me on the A frame and did a photo shoot on someone else. That position was a perfect balanced scene where I was absolutely far into subspace and I don’t know for how long. Time didn’t matter and I was just intensely taking in my bondage and all that happened around me. Wow!

And you challenged me with a hood as I had asked for and it didn’t work for me. I’m sorry for it and a little bit ashamed as well. I wanted it to work!! After that you went over to push me in ultra high heels. It was probably not a very beautiful sight but I do very much appreciate the struggle you let me through. I so much wanted to keep them on at to fight them. I kind of lost control of myself fighting to stand and it was a hard thing. A perfect fight. I’m not normally that fond of predicaments but this one was good with me. High heels makes my mind melt and Giving me a pair takes away other doubts and increases my will to cope. I’m not sure why but I think you have seen that with me several times. Thank you for letting me fight those unwearable heels for a while.

So here is my idea not to give up the hood. Please send the hood to me by mail, the one you tried to use. I will practice with it until the next time we meet, first by just wearing it by itself, then by adding mental pressure by for instance getting a new time lock and gradually increase the time wearing it and not being able to remove it. I think also that ordering me to put it on and then get me into position is a way forward. So if you are willing to continue to try, that’s my best idea.  I’ll put my address at the end below.

I think we spent the third day upstairs a lot. It was a hogtie on a bed that was later removed I suddenly I was suspended again. You got me there – another turn that was absolutely not in my mind and really good.
You also put me in a kind of suspended X with splinters and I remember you said it looked awesome. Legs were stretched broad and it was almost like the day one suspension on the fucking machine where I was kind of floating in bondage absolutely tight and with ropes, clamps and other stuff changing around.
You also suspended me in the A-frame after locking legs and arms in a bent position by some leather bondage equipment we have not used before. I took a while to get into. Sometimes I struggle to know when to warn you if the pain is too much for me in the present condition. I always want to take what you decide to put me in and still I try to keep me from panicking. The absolute essence of this long session was my mental stage on day 4 when you had me close or in subspace nearly all the time and I really felt giving any kind of control up just letting the body settle into the positions and put the last bit of control I had to You. That was a first time for me and I think that we would never have reached that without managing this 4 day session. Also, I hope that we can go there quicker next time because ending up in that mental space is almost religious and there is absolutely no threshold left to pass for You. A point of no resistance – nor physically, nor mentally. A perfect place to be for me. Thank You!

In the letter before our session I did put in a word for a perfect standing pole tie. This time, you chose other variants and I ended up against a pole with the ballet boots on at one stage. Being forced to stand in those is challenging and also a good thing with me. I can’t stand as long n those as in the black knee boots though. You used the ballets more than the 6” knee boots this time – I like that it is not up to me to decide, I like that you can lock them in place and I adore having them on in suspensions. Day 4 You had me partially standing on those and partially suspended a some stage. The ballets makes it impossible for me to stand up without support so you effectively deprive me from being able to stand or walk as well.
Still I would be happy to use the knee boots more next time. The struggle comes more gradually in those and many muscles are affected in keeping the balance. And you had them on as well. I think you tied me to the wheel in those. That was a good position you being able to switch me quickly from straight up to upside down. I know I signalled a worry to you when tied to the wheel. My meaning was only that the metal gag was hurting. Maybe you took it as the position was poor – it wasn’t. I would be happy to go there again.

In the cell we also did a shibari scene – gradually I was suspended and then turned 360 by a constant move of the ropes. I was a bit nervous of the sharp pain some ropes created at times, but I learned that there would soon be another rope easing or changing that to something I could take better. It was rope only, a change to everything else and I think this scene was a good precursor to what Novella did as the final challenge upstairs. That and also the mental stage you had put me in after this amazing flow you had the whole of day 4.

At some stage upstairs you let another person tie me in a suspension. Again I so much enjoyed being an integral part of the studio and the play that was happening around me. Sometimes I listened to your instructions and felt the effect, sometimes I just floated in the position and took it in. Afterwards, you kept me in varying bondage at the same time as you made a beautiful rope suspension on your friend and you let me have a close look as well. That whole scene was a moment with this magic mix of bondage and this atmosphere that seem to circle around you wherever you go and whatever you do. I’m so happy that you are making me a part of that when we meet.

As said before, not many moments were spent in contact with the floor. I love this of corse and I also love being put on high heels. I also love when you are using the heels for suspension or pulling the feet up and combining the two. Maybe I miss (just a little) the lingering ache in my feet and calf muscles I have had from sessions where you pushed the heels more. Well, this time it was replaced by other memories. A few marks stayed on for three weeks or so and maybe you wonder about my nipple challenge to you? Did I feel them hurting after three days?
Well, maybe a tiny tiny bit… I think that we could be a little tougher here maybe – not using heavier clamps but using them on more occasions and maybe a position or two where you work the nipples more intensely with both fingers and clamps as a push (did I really write this?). Lets talk about it before next time, its not the main focus anyway, just a detail. At least at one time I had to ask you to remove some clamps in order not to disturb the other bondage, so there is a balance to be found.

You had me wearing an electric plug at some stage. The plug itself was fine but the electricity didn’t work as I have felt it before. It was more of a stinging pain than something that get the muscles to contract. Maybe we should try a different set next time? It is also a feeling of helplessness when the electricity contracts muscles outside the own will. Also securing a plug for some time with the crotch harness is good. I think you did this at least once and it felt that you used a little longer plug than before. It felt good and again I think it was partly because of the day one activities.

I know I have probably forgot to write about many things and hopefully you have understood how much I liked everything anyway so far. The finest thing ever! And you were excellent as a team. It felt that you triggered each other to new ideas and you worked so seamlessly. Many times I was not able to feel the difference on who was working where. I just had to let go of that and take it all in. I am also deeply happy that you kept on as a team the whole session. Again, the flow of day 4 was outside anything I could ever wish for and an experience I will carry closest to heart.

You put me in a frog tie a few times and on day 4 you made it super-tight and in a suspension! The feeling was just amazing and my only regret was that I was a bit worn down and couldn’t manage to stay in it as long as I would have liked. It was absolutely perfect. There was no movement left ant it was all tight. I’m so curious on how it looked.

The way you shifted me during the fourth day – many times suspended from the bamboo bar and in so many variations. It was a perfect bondage flow, a perfect bondage day and a magic touch straight into my heart. When you let me out I was absolutely done. Empty and still full of perfect submission.

And in that stage you brought me upstairs to finish off with a shibari session. Yes, that made me nervous. Novella told me it might be difficult and that symmetry is ugly in shibari – that was something to take in… Then I deeply enjoyed being but in the rope body harness. How the ropes tightened around the torso still not limiting arms or legs whilst bringing a bondage pressure that felt deeply. I was not sure on how to manage the suspension part but I so much wanted to give my body to the ropes and to you. There were like three variations and I adored especially the first one and again the motion and change by altering the ropes almost like a dance. I felt very calm although the pressure was intense. I remember whispering that I was beginning to reach my limit. A few minutes later I heard at a distance, Novella telling Viv – ‘I’m out of rope’.

After having at least one leg to ease of the rope pressure with, I also enjoyed the gentle way out of the ropes and the perfect calm around this part and just afterwards.
It became an unusual and very Intense and warm finish of a session I will never forget and always want to revisit. Perfect.

We used the lenses more than I thought we would do and I think it was a good choice. There is no pressure of a blind fold and I’m totally deprived of seeing. It makes the other senses so much more sensitive and keeps me not knowing what’s going on. I think I will order a new pair soon so I’ll know that they are ready for a new session.
Yes, I would so much want to go here again, with around the same setup and see where it will take us. I know we might have to wait a while for a new session like this but it is ok. I sincerely hope that you would like to try it again. Maybe we could aim for next summer for a long session and try to get one or two shorter in during the winter. What are your thoughts?

Maybe there are things we did that you wonder why I didn’t write anything of. Just ask me if there is something special you would like to know. Its just that I have forgotten or my thoughts when writing this went off in a different direction. I am deeply happy and touched of what we did together and your place in my heart continues to be the most intimate, sincere and joyful.

With much love,

Yours, as ever,
J